And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were merry, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire.

Artie'cles

:: Joshua Starling

Home

Er, Sportsmanship or Something

Ok. I know it may be borderline sacrilegious for me to say anything bad about FSU Football or Bobby Bowden, the most “winningest” coach in College Football. I’m not turning my back on the Noles, but sometimes you have to say enough is enough. This is my enough. This is my rant.

The following quotes are reproduced verbatim.   

Quote: "I would hate to repeat, or say what I think about that because I'm such a sweet guy ... Really, I loathe those kind of people," Bowden said. "That's them dagum playmaker experts or whatever they are ... what's that game everybody plays ... PlayStation. They're PlayStation All-Americans up there. They think they know football because they happen to see a television game ... It'd be like me watching Dr.Kildare and think I can operate on a brain." – Bobby Bowden

Rant: I like Bobby Bowden. I really used to have a lot of respect for him, but this comment was completely wrong. Let me translate what Bobby Bowden is really saying. I loathe the majority of FSU Football fans. They come to the games consistently, but have no idea what football involves beyond video games.” Is it really a worth insulting your fan base? Give us a little credit.  Any what is this about operating on a brain? Is coach football on the same level as brain surgery? If we were to use this metaphor correctly, it would go like this. “ They think they know football because they happen to see a television game… It’d be like me watching Dr. Jack Kevorkian and thinking that patients should come out of the hospital alive or something absurd like that.” With Chris Rix being the only quarterback in the history of college football to lose to the same team five times, I think maybe the fans are smart enough to understand that something is wrong.

Quote: Hello, I’m T.K Wetherell president of Florida State University. FSU has a tradition of being a friendly and open campus. When you see a visitor welcome them to our campus. Make them feel like you would want to be made to feel on their campus. Remember, we cheer for our teams and we do not boo any athletes. Seminole Pride means treating others with respect. The most lasting memory a visitor takes away from FSU should be the best one we can give. – T.K. Wetherell

Rant: I have to admit that I have been disgusted by T.K. Wetherell since he came to FSU as president. I wrote an e-mail to him and got a grammatically horrendous response completely void of any relevance to what I had written. That and he basically turned my graduation into a cheap fund-raising event. Personal bias aside, this quote really irritates me. I agree that Seminole Pride should by synonymous with sportsmanship, but we seem to be overlooking one thing. Somehow, despite the repeated chants of “Bulls**t Bulls**t” toward the referees and the usual “F**k Miami, F**k Miami” and “F**k Florida F**k Florida” at the respective games, we are all such great sportsmen – that is until Chris Rix is boo-ed. I don’t know why T.K. tried to cover this message up by making it sound like it is about visitors. Honestly, are “Bulls**t” and “F**k (insert team name)” the lasting memories to which he alludes. No, he is more concerned about booing our own QB. That and money. Mostly money.

Quote: Those two poor throws were enough to test the patience of Bobby Bowden – and the FSU head coach already was plenty aggravated by then. Bowden said that Sexton’s performance was shaky enough to have him glancing down the bench in search of a backup quarterback who could do a better job. -- Randy Beard “QB Wyatt Sexton faces some road adversity for first time” Tallahassee Democrat 10-10-2004.

Rant: This is sad, yet true. Somehow losing to Miami five times wasn’t enough to aggravate Bobby Bowden enough to look down the bench for a backup quarterback who could do a better job, but two poor throws is too much for Sexton. I am not sure, but if I were playing PlayStation and my quarterback sucked, I would look for another long before losing five times to the same team. Oh well.

I’m still pondering the irony of having a coach with a record for winning and a quarterback with a record for losing.

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Until then... Hike,

Artie



Copyright © 2004 JoshuaStarling.com

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