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| Fore note |
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Since last week was the Hurricane
exercise and my jobs change during disasters and exercises, I am
having another first week of work. This week I am a Management
Analyst (Planner I) instead of a response liaison. I am not
exactly sure what Management Analyst means, but that is the job
title attached to the paycheck I will be getting. So, I am content
with whatever title.
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| Week
2 - Monday |
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Today I happened to be looking up a
name in the DEM directory and saw where they finally added me to
the list. Interestingly, they added me twice. Both entries for me
have the same name, contact phone number, office number, etc. The
only difference is that each entry lists a different fax number.
This amuses me because I did not realize that I had a fax number
to begin with. I wonder where the faxed messages would go if Arvil
#1 faxed Arvil #2.
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| Week
2 - Tuesday |
If you get home one day and your
roommate (or spouse if you are married) has changed the locks, it
is probably a bad sign. Well, I got to work today only to realize
that the locks have been changed and that I do not have the new
style of key card. After waiting a few minutes, somebody comes
along and lets me in.
Today I also realized the importance of getting a job description.
I had to fill out a form to get a new badge. On this form was a
line for my emergency response team duty, which is Response
Liaison. Well, I wanted to make sure I spelled Liaison correctly
so I looked the word up on Webster.com. According to Webster, a
Liaison is "an illicit sexual relationship." I later
looked this up on dictionary.com. As an example of how to
correctly use the word, the example sentence was "served as
the President's liaison with Congress." I guess that means
that Monica Lewenski was President Clintonıs "liaison."
I never wanted to admit having anything in common with Monica
Lewenski, but we were both interns who became liaisons. Yikes.
Word of advice, get a job description before you take a job.
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| Week
2 - Wednesday |
I still canıt get into the door
today. I hope I havenıt been fired. Or at least I hope I havenıt
been taken off payroll. Anyway, somebody finds me outside and lets
me in.
Today is special because I finally get my new ID badge. My nice
new badge that says Response Liaison. Well, not until after I get
my badge and return to my cube do I realize that it stills says
intern on it. Demoted! The day ends with a staff meeting to
discuss progress and software issues. After the meeting, one lady
mentions wanting a promotion and not knowing how to get it.
Another lady jokes and makes the innuendo that you know to know
the right positions. I guess she hasnıt learned her liaison
responsibilities yet. But at least she isnıt an intern.
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| Week
2 - Thursday |
I'm not sure my health insurance
benefits are activated yet, but I decided I would risk using the
fridge today. If you have ever been in an office situation, you
know what I mean. When I was in the geography department at FSU,
we had a communal coffee maker. Communal basically means everyone
uses it, but nobody cleans it. The fridge is about the same way.
Only the fridge is packed. I have to use a crisper drawer to hide
my food. It reminds me of a rain forest. The diversity is amazing,
but if you want to find the one plant that will save your life,
you have to bushwhack through the overflowing abundance of
poisonous and man-eating plants. Speaking of Coffee, the lady in
the cubicle joining mine spilled her coffee grinds all over her
desk. Yesterday she spilled them on the desk, but today she
spilled them on the desk, in the drawers, over the keyboard, and
probably everywhere else coffee grinds can be spilled. I realized
what had happened when I ask her what the noise she is making is
about. I thought she was trying to knock down a cubicle wall to
get a better view of the window or something.
I finally have my new badge now. I picked it up and made sure it
says Planner I instead of intern. I also get my card key for the
door. I end my day at work pondering my phone. There are usually
buttons on the phone that say things such as silence, transfer,
hold, etc. My phone is special. It is a Spanish phone. You donıt
speed dial, you push the button that says llamada rapid. You donıt
re-deail, you push the rellamada button. I have figured most of
the buttons out, but there are still a few I am unsure about. Does
anyone know what msj en espe means? Me either. I would ask
somebody about it, but I donıt think I want them playing Bob the
Builder with my phone again.
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| Week
2 - Friday |
I wake up with the song "Everybody's
working for the weekend" in my head. It is so true. I get to
work today. Now that I have my badge that lets me in the door, a
lady is there to let me in. Where was she when I actually needed
somebody to let me in? Who knows. While I am in my cubicle, I hear
another co-worker announce that he has spilled his coffee grinds
all over his desk. With the lady spilling hers twice and the guy
spilling his today, I think the whole office needs a little break
from the caffeine. When you are too jittery to measure coffee, you
know you are in trouble.
A final special moment of the day was when I reviewed a hazard
analysis that stated something about an estimated 5 to 5000 people
could be impacted by a chemical release depending on the wind
direction. This had me thinking. The area around the facility is
only a tenth of a mile. I have a hard time believing that five
people live on one side of the facility while 5000 people live on
the other side of the facility all in a circle with a radius of
1/10 of a mile from the facility. I just requested that the writer
of the analysis be more specific.
Off to Tennessee to go white water rafting. Yes.
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Copyright
© 2004 JoshuaStarling.com
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