Archives - April 2004

April 5, 2004 - Alive and kicking

Hello boys and girls. Wow, it has most certainly been a very long time since I have updated my site. I mean, I didn't even post on my birthday (March 26) or April Fools Day. I still have a hard time believing that I missed that one. Geez. I did, however, put together a little something for Kari's Birthday. And thanks to everyone who wished me a Happy 23rd Birthday. Kari, you rock!!

In other news, I was more or less crushed today in Subway. I be-bopped my way up to Subway today to get me a Big Kids Pack. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Subway (and shame on you), a BKP consists of a round sandwich, chips, cookie, and a drink. The average retail value is $3.36. You can't beat that with a stick. So I get up to the register and I tell her that its going to be a BKP. She precedes to inform me that they don't have them anymore!!!!! I promptly tore my robes and shook my fist at her. Now I have to pay $4.25 for a round, chips and a drink. Grrrrrrr.... Now I can honestly say that back in my day we had to walk three miles, bare foot in the snow ,to reach Subway and pay $3.36 for a Big Kids Pack. Which, by the way, is extinct now.

Now I will leave you with my internet table scraps:

Lego Land World Builder - A Flash Strategy game set in the Lego world. Totally awesome!!

Action Comics #1 - A scanned comic book that features the first appearance of Superman from 1938.

Retro TV Intros - A site that features the intros of cool TV shows from the 70s and 80s. Sometimes the videos aren't available for download because of bandwidth limitations. So keep checking back from time to time.

Elvish Name Generator - If you lived in Middle Earth, what would your name be? Elves call me Elwë Helyanwë. My hobbit name is: Polo Foxburr of Loamsdown. Does that mean I can't play Marco Polo now?

April 7, 2004 - Decided to change a few things today

Its my website and I can do what I want to. So do you like the new changes? The old scheme was a temporary layout until I could find something better. I was tooling around on the internet yesterday when my buddy Matt sent be a link to a site. Nifty site and I really liked the main page layout. So I "borrowed" a few design tips and here it is. I'll probably make a few more changes here and there to give it that "Joshua" feel. I will probably be awhile before I can convert the rest of the site due to massive formatting changes required. Story of my life. The other website also had a feature that I really enjoyed and it will probably make its way over here as well.

I also had a few moments to come up for air and I thought that I would share with you the beast that has been sucking away all my time. Its a program that I have been working on for the last month or so that basically performs data transfer and validation. The sad thing is that this is what I want to do with the rest of my life. Enjoy! Oh yeah, I fixed the Elvish Name Generator link from the other day.

Finally, check out this before and after pic of Destin over the last 40 years.

April 8, 2004 - Happy Birthday Angela!!!!!!!

Well how about that? Three, count'em, three updates in one week. Not too shabby if you ask me. And even if you didn't ask me, its still not too shabby. And if you are saying to yourself, "What gives this kid the right to talk to me like that?" Take a gander at the domain name at the top, the logo, flash animation and other visual aids...you're on my turf now sucker.

I found this very interesting article the other day on the internet. It really proves that Linux is highly portable: How to install Linux on a Dead Badger. Please note, for safety's sake, that the badger is DEAD before you attempt the installation. Next week we'll be porting a snake and a mushroom.

And what's better than playing with matches? Sending them into orbit. Here's how to make Matchstick Rockets.

I also go my Work, Links, and Apartment pages changed over to the new format.

April 12, 2004 - Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays

Today I unveil my latest creation: My Arch Nemesis page. This is where I take the time to recognize the major sources of crap in my life, some humorous and some not. Right now I've got three posted and I'll attempt to add a total of 10 or so, depending on how much crap I have going on.

While you are on the internet, you may want to check this out. American Express as teamed up Seinfield and old school cartoon Superman for a couple of commercials. They are actually funny. No really, I'm not kidding.

Also, here is an educational tool that can be amusing. Its a tool used for calculating the impact of an asteroid on Earth and the resulting damage. The first time around I only managed to kill myself. That's what I get for standing at the center of ground zero. The second time I managed to wipe a land mass the size of the US off the face of the Earth. Not a bad improvement if I do say so myself. Now I just gotta figure out how to aim it for France.

And behold! I give you the real life Millennium Falcon. The Millennium Falcon may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid.

Lastly, Homestar Runner was a new short called "Powered by the Cheat" which can be viewed here. Red vs. Blue posted Episode 29 - "Radar Love" today as well. You can download the episode from their main page.

April 13, 2004 - Hmmm feels like Monday

Did you get that memo? I could have sworn today was Monday. Sure seems like it. Oh well, at least I got the one about my TPS reports.

We a little mishap at work last Thursday. Check out this pic of the accident. If you are not familiar with that type of trailer, its called a container. Basically, we load 2-ton sacs of material (i.e. super-sacs) into the back of the these trucks. Once the truck is fully loaded, it drives to a seaport. There, a crane lifts the container from the wheels of the trailer and loads the it on a ship. Then the truck gets a new container and its off again. We are still not sure how it happened, but the rear pins on the back of the container came loose. When the truck drove off, the rear wheels stayed place. Ouch! That's the third time its happened since I've been here.

On top of that, we had a train derailment yesterday. Apparently, the train was moving down the tracks and it crossed a switch (kinda like a fork in the road). Well, somehow the switch got triggered when the train was half way over the switch. So we ended up with half the train on one set of tracks and and the back half on another set of tracks, branching off in a different direction. In case you haven't checked out a rail car lately., they have a pretty tight locking mechanism. So the laws of physics gave up and went home when the cars wouldn't unlock, the train pulled both sets of tracks together. Here are some resulting pics: One and Two.

Here is a Girl's Guide to Geek Guys. Pay close attention to this one...very close. I can't stress that enough young peoples.

In closing, I leave you a classic: The Acme Catalog. Man, I wish I could order stuff from here.

April 14, 2004 - T-Minus 1 Day to Tax Day

In case you are a working stiff like me and/or not claimed by your parents, your income taxes are due tomorrow by midnight. And by claimed, I mean legally on a form they give to the government. What your parents said or do in public is a whole 'nother story.

Also, I've noticed a tend at work. Yesterday I had to take down our email server twice for about 30 minutes. During those outages, I was walking back and forth to the computer room and my office, which is across the building from the other. On one of my many trips, there seemed to be a lot of people in the halls. That's strange. I observed similar results when I took our server down again. Hmmmm.....there must be a common denominator here. And that's when it hit me. When my users couldn't forward jokes, chain letters, meeting announcements, to do lists, or whatever people send in emails, they actually got up to talk to one another. Wow. I guess its like when the power goes out for a more than a few hours and then 9 months later there is a population explosion. If I were a sociology major, this would be my senior thesis.

Here a a few sites and I thought were funny for today:

VG Music - A site with a lot of music from videogames. Be sure to check out the NES section for a trip down memory lane.

The Man Commandments - Rules that everyman should live by. Just as a warning, there is some shady material here. You have been forewarned.

Angela, this one is for you: How much money would it take for you to kill a puppy with your bare hands?

Lastly, I slimmed and trimmed the main page down. You'll find the previous updates for this month in the Archives section.

April 16, 2004 - Death and Taxes...

...The only two things constant in life. A mucho huge thanks to Mrs. Pat who helped me with my taxes. She saved me a lot of money and I didn't have to file for an extension. Lets just say that I won't be using TaxCut ever again to do my taxes. Boo hiss.

But I guess the good news is that today is Friday. That means that after today, we have two days until it starts again. What a vicious cycle. Speaking of vicious things, I posted Arch Nemesis #4 today.

And now for some old school links:

How many of you remember Underoos: Underwear that's fun to wear!!? Here's a site which features a lot of the original ones. Man, there was nothing like pretending to be your favorite superhero (or villain) in your underwear. Almost as good as being about to shop online in your underwear.

This site features players with awesome feats of true videogame skills and a total lack of interaction with the opposite sex. Check it out to see them beat a wide varierty of NES games and some SNES, N64, and GC games. This site also hosts different files as well.

April 17, 2004 - Special Saturday Edition

Well, today is a rare occasion...I'm updating my website on the weekend. So what brings this momentous event on? I'm stuck at work on a Saturday doing a mail server upgrade. Its one of those things where its either a really smooth process or a little gift from the foul depths of hell. Not to mention the fact that its a slow process...one of those hurry up and wait deals. So I'll probably be spending most of my Saturday in the computer room, where the current temp is 63.7 degrees F (with the door wide open) and 0% humidity. And what better way to kill time than to update my site:

I found this very funny. Not sure if you remember, but when UConn won both the Men's and Women's Final Four, they had a "little" student led riot. Well, the Dean of Students is none to happy with the students, especially the ones the University of Connecticut has posted on their website. Personally, I like 2,4, & 5.

Here is a rap music video about drinking Milk. I'm telling ya, Bubba Sparxxx has gotta be jealous...dogg.

And if you are going to do it, do it right.

Finally, here is a more or less scanned copy of the very first Nintendo Power with some interesting commentary.

April 19, 2004 - Rinse, Wash, Repeat

Its Monday again. Well, 13 hours later, the mail server upgrade completed. The scary part is that it went well...very well. Upgrades don't usually go well in our computer room. Probably because we built it on top of an old Indian burial ground. I mean, it sounded like a good idea at the time. But then again a lot of my ideas sound good at the time.

I did pull a typical college student maneuver and I went home this past weekend to visit my parents up in the thriving metropolis of Climax. I also got to visit my home church for some good ol' fashioned Southern Baptist preachin'. If you never experienced that before, it goes a little something like this. If I knew that tree rats really did that, I probably wouldn't use them for target practice as much.

Fallon, here is the How to Speak l33t guide I was telling you about. Now you can be l33t too!!

(insert drool puddle here) This website features the trailer to the Final Fantasy VII movie. Even though its in Japanese, its total eye candy and won't matter anyways.

Red vs. Blue posted Episode 30 - "I Dream of Meanie" today as well. You can download the episode from their main page.

April 20, 2004 - I've seen it all

I witnessed a very unusual act the other night. Two apartments in my complex were having parties that were across the parking lot from each other. One apartment party consisted primarily of ladies, the other mostly guys. Typically in nature, its the male who has to strut his stuff, flash his feathers, play a skins game of football, or chase other males from the women. But this was not the case. The ladies were yelling, cheering, and in some cases, even a little dancing. Sure 'nuff, the guys came over like flies to honey. Needless to say, I have contacted Discovery channel and they are supposed to come a do a documentary on the whole thing. It should prove to be a little interesting.

Here is a site that features all the cool tricks that MacGyver pulled in most of his TV episodes. Thanks to him, I now carry a paper clip, rubber band, a stick of chewing gum, a piece of string, and my trusty Swiss Army knife everywhere I go. You know...just in case.

Good luck trying to beat this game.

I updated my Arch Nemesis section today. As with any Arch Nemesis, I gave them each a special power.

And finally...Strongbad Email #101

April 21, 2004 - (Busy)^3

In case you don't hear from me for a couple of days, that beast of a program that I was working on has reared its ugly head again. This time it came in the form of a, "Oh by the way, could you add this and this and this? If you could do that, that would be great." Also, finals are approaching and I guess I should start studying. Once school is out, I'm going to do a reorg of the files on this site (tidy things up) and get some new material posted.

OK, I'm going to write my Congress person to see if I can get this added to the proposed amendment defining marriage. That shouldn't be legal in any state...or planet.

No no no no no no no no no no no no, you are.... wrong. I don't even think I can watch one of my favorite movies the same way again....evar.

A true classic: Test your knowledge with the Urinal Game.

And to erase all the mental scarring that I just left you, here are some classic commercials from the 80's.

April 23, 2004 - Brought to you by the letters W, T, & F and the #2

H'OK. I was looking in the book store yesterday and I ran across the most unusual book I've ever seen. Scratch that. Make that the stupidest book in the entire world. Don't get me wrong, I like to see the cross-pollination of different franchises, but give me a break!! Let's break this down into the old school Animaniacs "Good Idea/Bad Idea." Good Idea: Bringing the Aliens and Predator series together. Bad Idea: Bringing the Star Trek and X-Men series together. That just screams unholy and wrong!!

And while I'm on my soap box, Paramount has taken advice from Microsoft and George Lucas with the release of Star Trek Service Pack 1. At first I thought it was a patch for a game, but as always, I was wrong. This is Paramount's attempt to please it's massive nerd fan base. You know the ones that I'm taking about: They dress up in full gear to go to the conventions or even go as far as to have themed weddings and what not. This is made for the guy who says, "In episode BR-343 when Spock says, 'Live long and prosper,' his fingers were not spread at 45 degree angle or 3" apart at the apex." happy. However, I will give them credit because even with the release of the Special Edition of Star Wars, Lucas still didn't fix the lightsaber battle between Vader and Obi-wan. Yes, I know, hypocrite. Maybe its just jealousy.

Also, I special congratulations goes out to Matt for beating Ruby Weapon in FFVII thereby completing the entire game, side quests and everything. I know most of you probably won't understand that, but believe me, that's an accomplishment which can only be described as a labor of love. And just under a decade too. The sad thing is that its still probably going to take me longer to graduate from college.

Finally, next week is finals week at FSU. With that, let me leave you a few distractions. Some of these are well known from other sides, but fun none the less:

A 3D game of Pong.

Dodge the blocks game.

Create your own super hero. This is totally awesome!!

Yummy! Eat all the fishes!!

Play a game of Fowl Words. You the power code to unlock the extras: 214972

Finally, this little site can keep you busy for hours. It just takes a few to load.

Good luck on Finals!!

April 28, 2004 - Another one bites the dust

Woo Hoo!!! Finals are over (at least for me) and another semester at FSU under my belt. Whew! So now that my brain is officially pudding and I don't feel like ranting, I leave you with these:

Hey mac, this is a stickup, gimme all your BOOOOM!!!!

Talk about getting a hair cut. Check out this sheep's fro.

This guy deserves an award for getting out of this traffic ticket.

Finally, another block type game to drive you insane.

April 29, 2004 - "Winners"

So after I got my mullet trimmed today, I went by Subway to get some lunch. And no, they still haven't brought the Big Kids Pack back by popular demand. I digress, so I'm standing in line and I see a buddy from high school's psycho ex-girlfriend standing there. Crap...I better duck and cover. Too Late!!!! So she slithers over to where I'm standing and said, "Hey! I saw you walk in and I was like, 'Its Johnny SomethingOrOther!!'." (And I don't even remember how she screwed over my last name). So now that I'm locked in, I have to be nice and do the small talk thing. At one point, and I kid you not, she asks me, "So...are you still working at...ummmm...(and looks down at my Engelhard Branded shirt then quickly looks away)...errr...Engelhard?" Way to go champ!! Nice try to impress with some obscure fact that you probably never knew in the first place.

I've been a little slow this week, but here are two updates you probably already know about:
Strongbad Email #102
Red vs. Blue posted Episode 31 - "Room for Rent". You can download the episode from their main page.

Here are two really cool articles: How to make a digital camera or a taser from a disposable camera.

And yet another Yeti Sports game has been released.

April 30, 2004 - Free at last, free at last

Well boys and girls...today is the last official day of the spring semester at FSU. After today, a whole gaggle of students will be flocking home for the summer. As for me, I'll be in Tallahassee doing the whole work thing. I hope everyone was a safe trip home and a fun summer. I guess I'll be seein ya in August. But not to fret, I'll still be updating the site on a semi-regular basis.

Well, one of my summer projects is going to be "Feed the Twins". I happened across a news story that had this pic on it. Geez Louise!! Man, ima thinkin that they are trying to get back to their weight during the Full House days. If I was worth $150 million, I would probably be about the size of a small country. Anyways, just email me your credit card and/or bank account numbers and the amount that you want to deduct. Thanks in advance for your support and the twins thank you as well.

And just went I thought that it could not get any worse...it does. I mean, BAH!!!! Talk about whoring out a legend. Not only that, but who would have the testicular fortitude to pull that finger? Not me my friends.

Curse you physics curse you!!!!!!

Lets take a trip back in time to 1981.